The works of Award winning author, Rick Pipito, and more

Review: Justice League War

Justice-League-War-2013-Movie-PosterDC comics has put out some of the BEST animations dating all the way back to Batman The Animated Series.  Sure there have been a few duds here and there, but overall they’ve been nice.  Here’s how I believe Justice League War fared.  Be warned… There ARE SPOILERS AHEAD!  If you don’t want to be spoiled, scroll down to the final paragraph for my rating.

Where to begin?  How about voice acting?  Batman was a bit different than normally, but I liked what was brough here.  The new voice is easily catchy and works well.  Darkseid’s voice was perhaps the BEST in a long time.  I loved how the gravelly look of his skin sort of echoed through his booming voice.  Other than those two, I didn’t feel anyone stood out as different enough to mention or necessarily bad, so once again I give Andrea Romano my approval for voice casting.

Animation:  The new 52 outfits were okay.  I didn’t mind the modern look, but I did have a few things that bothered me.  Parademons looked like garbage, as did Cyborg’s initial design.  I wanted to know what was going on.  My son was confused as well, and said, “Daddy, that’s not Cyborg.  It’s a giant robot.”  My daughter, more fascinated with Wonder Woman wondered a few things as well.  One of her comments echoed in my mind before she said it.  Wonder Woman didn’t look all that beautiful.  I’m not saying she has to be a sex symbol, but Wonder Woman is supposed to appear pretty.  I get the amazonian warrior thing, but to me, her face wasn’t animated all that well.  At least not as good as past interpretations.  Some of the CG didn’t gel with the animation in parts of the battle, but overall the animation wasn’t bad.  I had more of a problem with the designs than anything.

Story:  Sigh.  I now know why people despise the New 52.  This was NOT a good story, and had many flaws.  First off, why was a Parademon dressed like Batman in the beginning?  It made no sense and was ignored throughout the rest of the story.  Then Wonder Woman again.  I know she’s new to our world and customs, but damn if she didn’t seem like an idiot.  If a tempermental and ill educated 16 year old (not an Amazonian leader) wore the wonder woman attire, that is what you’d have here.  Flat out?  She seemed like a moron with a teenage crush on Superman because he was “so strong.”  Green Lantern’s outbursts were another thing.  I know Hal Jordan is a sarcastic and cocky guy, but this version of Hal was not very bright despite his emerald glow.  Even with an untended broken arm, he was going to go back into battle against Darkseid… oh, and since when did he know how to set a broken limb?  I didn’t know that the green Lantern ring could perfectly set broken bones too.  Then there is Superman….

So Superman now just attacks people he doesn’t know?  Green Lantern and Batman were immediately perceived as threats, and he damn near tried to kill them.  Speaking of, he killed Desaad (the Emperor Palpatine look alike) with a neck snap.  WTF?!   And Billy Batson is now a punk thief who just so happened to shout “Shazam” as he was going to bludgeon a parademon.  Oh, right, I guess Captain Marvel (Shazam) is now just an accidental origin that suddenly knows how to be a hero.  Wisdom of Solomon or Wit of bad writers?  I’m going with the latter.  I wasn’t aware he could shoot lightning from his hands now either.

Flash, Batman and Cyborg were all good in the movie, but as I mentioned I hated Cyborg’s initial design.  Darkseid was less threat and more destroyer however.  I enjoyed seeing him destroy everything, but he seemed too powerful to allow a stab in both eyes.  Yes, they stabbed his eyes out.  Common sense would tell you that Wonder Woman’s first sword thrust into his right eye would also shish kabob his brain judging by how deep the blade went, but I guess Darkseid has no brain now either.  The other question is if Wonder Woman and the others don’t hesitate to kill the Parademons, why wouldn’t then they just kill Darkseid too.  They could have at this point… instead they stuck a crowbar in his other eye.  Ugh.  Should I continue?

Oh yes, then Cyborg (who basically is one of Darkseid’s computers at this point) closes the portals to Apokolips, but upon closing them, they act as black holes, but they only suck in the Parademons.. nothing else.  No cars, nothing.  Just Parademons.  The final battle against Darkseid was weak too.  I felt as though I was watching 7 Ghostbusters try to wrangle a ghost into a trap with their combined crossing of streams.  Oh wait, that’s another franchise.  And don’t get me started on that Super 7 comment.

Yes, I’ve become increasingly angrier as I’ve written this just thinking about it all.  Maybe it was because I just reviewed JLA Trapped In Time as well.  One GOOD thing that can be said is that there was a post credits scene that showed Ocean Master rising from the depths with a dead Atlantean in his arms.  I guess this means we are getting a New 52 shared dcanimated universe now.  I am eager to see an Aquaman stand alone animated movie that follows this up, but I really don’t care to see this League again on screen unless something is done to correct the monstrosity that was War.

I feel as if DC has hired a bunch of high school kids to do their work at this point.  Poor dialogue and a shoddy plotline scream inexperience and lack of care.  Call me extremely disappointed.  3 out of 10 sCrypt coffins is all I can give this one, and the animation is really why I rate it that high.  What did you think?  Did you agree or do you feel my review is too harsh?

 

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